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Parenting playbook » Teenage Blues » Sexual education

Sexual education

    As parents, one of our most important tasks is to help our children become healthy, informed and responsible adults. In this process, sex education plays a prominent role, especially during adolescence, when young people begin to discover their own identities and develop relationships. 

    What does sex education mean?

    Sexuality education is a comprehensive educational process that teaches knowledge, skills and values ​​related to sexuality. This includes knowledge of bodily changes, reproduction, emotional relationships, sexual health, and safe sexual practices. This type of education focuses not only on biological factors, but also on psychological, social and emotional aspects.

    Why is sex education important?

    • Prevention : Helps prevent unwanted pregnancies and sexually transmitted infections (STIs).
    • Awareness : Enables young people to make informed decisions about their own bodies and relationships.
    • Boosting self-confidence : Strengthens self-confidence and self-esteem, which helps young people to stand up for their own limits.
    • Improving communication : Promotes healthy communication and effective dialogue about sexuality.
    • Respect and Equality : Teaches the importance of mutual respect and equality in relationships.

     The 10 main tasks of sex education

    • Early "start" : Don't wait until the teenage years. You can start teaching basic physical skills at an early age, naturally in an age-appropriate way.
      • Example : Teach small children the names of their body parts and their functions.
    • Open communication : Create a confidential and open atmosphere where children can safely ask questions and talk about sexuality.
      • Example : "Any questions you have about your body or sexuality, I'm always here to answer them."
    • Separating facts from myths : Provide accurate and authentic information so that children do not base their decisions on wrong information.
      • Example : Let's talk about the different methods of contraception and their effectiveness.
    • Emotional aspects : Don't just focus on biological factors, but also on emotional and psychological aspects.
      • Example : "Sexuality is not only about the physical act, but also about emotions and the quality of relationships."
    • Safety first : Teach young people the importance of safe sex and the correct use of contraception.
      • Example : "It is important to always use a condom to protect yourself and your partner."
    • Accessible resources : Show them where they can find reliable information and help when they need it.
      • Example : We recommend authentic websites and literature on the subject.
    • Role-playing : Have children practice handling different situations, for example how to say no when they feel pressured.
      • Example : “Let's try to pretend that someone is pressuring you. What would you say to him?”
    • Parental example : Let's set a good example in our own relationships and communication.
      • Example : "Your father and I are always honest about our relationship and treat each other with respect."
    • Sexual identity and orientation : Respect and support young people's sexual identity and orientation, and help them discover them.
      • Example : "No matter what your sexual orientation is, we will always support and love you."
    • Creating emotional safety : Make sure that children feel emotionally safe and know that they can turn to us for support at any time.
      • Example : "I'm always here to listen and help you, no matter what."
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    Talking about sexuality with our teenage children is perhaps one of the biggest challenges as a parent. In this stage of life, young people are often open to the topic, but they still prefer to talk about it with their friends, teachers or even strangers instead of their parents. There could be many reasons for this, but it is important for us to understand why it is imperative that we still talk to them about this important topic.

    Why is it difficult for children to talk about sex with their parents?

    • Shame : Talking about sexuality is uncomfortable for many teenagers because they fear that their parents will view them differently.
    • Fear : They fear that their parents will judge or scold them for their questions or interests.
    • Need for autonomy : At this age, young people desire more and more independence and do not want their parents to know every detail of their lives.
    • Communication gap : Communication between parents and children can sometimes be difficult due to generational differences.

    Why do we insist on talking about it anyway?

    • Reliable information : Parents can ensure that children receive authentic and accurate information about sexuality, rather than relying on misconceptions or misleading sources.
    • Emotional support : Parents can provide emotional support and reassurance as young people face new experiences and questions.
    • Conveying values : It is possible for parents to pass on their own values ​​and views, helping children to make responsible decisions.
    • Prevention : Proper sex education reduces the risk of unwanted pregnancies and sexually transmitted diseases.

    How to talk about sexuality with your teenage child?

    • Create a confidential atmosphere : It is important to provide a confidential and calm environment during the conversation, where the children feel safe and can confidently ask questions.
      • Example : “I know this is a sensitive topic, but it's very important to talk about it honestly. You can ask me anything and I will try to answer to the best of my ability.”
    • Be open and honest : Show that we are open to all questions and answer honestly.
      • Example : “I was young too, and I remember how difficult it was to talk about these things. But I'm here to help and answer any questions you may have.”
    • Use understandable language : Avoid overly complicated technical terms and speak clearly and comprehensibly.
      • Example : “Contraception means preventing an unwanted pregnancy. There are many ways to do this, and each has its advantages and disadvantages.”
    • Continuous conversations : Don't limit yourself to just one big conversation, but return to the topic regularly as the children grow and new questions arise.
      • Example : "We can talk about this anytime if you have new questions or if something is not clear."
    • Let's give examples from life : Use everyday examples and stories to bring the topic closer.
      • Example : “Remember when our friend had a baby? Let's talk about how it works and why it's important to be responsible."
    • Clarify our values : Share your own views and values, but let the children form their own opinions.
      • Example : “I want you to know that respect and health are important to me when it comes to sexual relationships. How do you see this?”
    • Use educational materials : Recommend books, websites, or other reliable resources that we can review together.
      • Example : “There is a very good book for teenagers about sexuality. Would you like us to review it together?”
    • Support the independent acquisition of information : Encourage the children to search for information independently, but always be ready to answer their questions.
      • Example : "If you find something on the Internet that is not clear, come and let's talk about it."
    • Pay attention to emotional signals : Be sensitive to children's emotional reactions and adapt to them.
      • Example : “I can see that this is uncomfortable for you right now. If you want, we can continue the conversation later.”
    • Ensure our support : Always assure the children that we support them and stand by them.
      • Example : "Whatever questions you have or whatever happens, I'm always here to help and support you."

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