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Goals and Motivation

    Now that we’ve delved deeply into various theories regarding parental roles and family functioning, it’s time to turn to the more practical side. That is, how can we bring about change in our everyday lives, how can we set goals that excite the children, make them eager to engage in the implementation, and feel ownership over them? We know that sometimes it seems impossible to awaken their energy for change while we yearn for it to come from internal motivation, that they always want to be better and improve. Just as we need goals, it’s also worth considering this concept for them.

    Why is goal-setting important in the family environment? 

    • Goal-setting promotes cooperation and cohesion within the family, allowing everyone to work together towards a common goal. 
    • Families can define goals for various areas of life, such as health, education, relationships, and career, thereby deepening their relationships by understanding each other’s focuses and values. 
    • When families set common goals and support each other in achieving them, they strengthen their bonds. 
    • Setting common goals equips families with techniques to overcome obstacles and achieve success.

    Principles of goal-setting: 

    • Collaboration and communication: It’s important for every family member to participate in defining and achieving goals. Open communication and collaboration are necessary for everyone to feel that their opinions and goals are important. 
    • Realistic and measurable goals: Goals should be realistic and achievable, taking into account the abilities, schedules, and resources of family members. It’s important for goals to be measurable, making it easier to track progress and evaluate results. 
    • Common values and objectives: Family goals should align with the family’s shared values and long-term objectives. This helps the family move forward in the same direction, united and cohesive. 
    • Responsibility sharing and collaboration: Each family member should have a role in achieving the goals, and they should help each other with tasks. Sharing responsibilities and collaborating strengthen family cohesion. 
    • Flexible adaptation: Family goals should be flexible and able to adapt to life’s changes and challenges. Sometimes goals may need to be modified or reassessed based on current circumstances. 
    • Motivation and support: It’s important for family members to support and motivate each other in achieving goals. Recognition and positive feedback help motivate individuals and contribute to strengthening family cohesion. 
    • Time management and priorities: Effective time management and setting priorities help achieve goals in family life. It’s important for every family member to have time and energy to achieve goals while maintaining balance with other important activities.

    You’ve already got a lot of goals in mind, but remember, less is sometimes more, especially when starting out. Also, it’s an important point, especially with teenagers, to pick your battles; it’s not worth getting involved in everything, as it usually leads to resistance. Here are some ideas on what to focus on, either for yourself or for your children: 

    • Academic advancement: Focus on academic goals that are truly important and contribute to academic progress, such as achieving better results in a particular subject or preparing more effectively for exams. 
    • Personal development: Choose goals that promote personal growth and increase self-confidence, such as acquiring a new skill or finding a hobby. 
    • Healthy lifestyle: Consider setting goals for a healthy lifestyle, such as regular exercise, healthy eating, or ensuring adequate sleep. These goals can help maintain physical and mental health. 
    • Nurturing relationships: Spend quality time with family and friends. Go out to play soccer, take a walk, or call grandma and listen to what she has to say. 
    • Stress management: Learn techniques and methods to help manage stress and maintain emotional balance. This could include meditation, breathing exercises, or emotional release through creative activities.

    Remember, it’s best to do it together. If you have similar goals to those of your children, as always, leading by example is the key, and if you can spend valuable time together pursuing goals, that’s just the icing on the cake.

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